Essex Cop Forwards Burundanga E-mail

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/politics/lawandorder/3530921/Detective-sent-hoax-date-rape-email-around-the-world.html

The Daily Telegraph [UK]
27 November 2008

Detective sent hoax date rape email around the world

A detective accidentally forwarded a hoax email about a powerful new date rape drug to hundreds of thousands of women around the world.

The bogus email claimed business cards impregnated with a drug called Burundanga were being handed out by criminals to women at petrol stations.

The drug was said to knock them out and leave them vulnerable to attack.

Detective Constable Simon Lofting, 34, from Essex Police received the email and forwarded it on to intelligence officers to check if it was real. [...]

Shanghai Sperm Bank Denies "Helping Hand" Rumor

http://www.shanghaidaily.com/article/?id=381959&type=Metro

Shanghai Daily
25 November 2008

Sperm bank denies 'helping hand' rumor

By Cai Wenjun

SHANGHAI Sperm Bank has been forced to issue a statement on its Website to clarify its procedures, after explicit photos circulated on the Internet, claiming to show female nurses helping men to "donate" at the sperm bank.

Officials from Renji Hospital, where the sperm bank is located, said yesterday they had received several inquiries about their practices after the hoax photos appeared online. They said the hospital's sperm-collecting procedure is in line with professional regulations and that the misleading pictures could tarnish the reputation of the hospital and the sperm bank. [...]

Unwitting Cannibalism

http://www.gazettelive.co.uk/news/teesside-news/2008/11/21/cannibal-call-not-a-hoax-say-tfm-bosses-84229-22310645/

Evening Gazette [UK]
21 November 2008

Cannibal call not a hoax say TFM bosses

Karen Faughey, Evening Gazette

A RADIO station has denied presenter Graham Mack's discussion with a former cannibal are part of a bold publicity stunt.

Listeners to TFM were left in shock after a caller admitted live on air that she was once an unwitting cannibal. [...]

"It was when I was a child when I lived in Africa. We always went to the same butcher and then suddenly ... the meat started to get so much better. It was only when we moved back to England ... that we realised that the butcher had been arrested because he farmed little black girls." [...]

http://www.gazettelive.co.uk/news/teesside-news/2008/11/22/identity-of-tfm-cannibal-is-revealed-84229-22317059/

Evening Gazette [UK]
22 November 2008

Identity of TFM "cannibal" is revealed

by Sarah Judd, Evening Gazette

THE identity of an unwitting "cannibal" who shocked TFM radio listeners with the tale of her former butcher's grisly secret can be revealed today.

Guisborough mum Anthea Harrison, 36, told how she may have eaten human flesh while living in Zambia. [...]

She wanted to make it clear the family could not be certain they had ever eaten human meat when they lived in Mufulira, Zambia.

Anthea also corrected her on-air claim that the man had killed "little black girls," as her mum later explained only one teenage girl had ever been found in his freezer. [...]

Business Owner Lays Off Obama Supporters

http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/08326/929664-85.stm

Post-Gazette [Pittsburgh, PA]
21 November 2008

Local businessman an innocent victim of Obama layoff hoax

By Ann Belser, Pittsburgh Post-Gazette

[...] Someone sent out an e-mail advising business owners that Mr. [Dan] Remely had resigned himself to having to lay off employees because of tax increases expected when Barack Obama becomes president.

According to the letter, he walked through his company's parking lot and found which cars had bumper stickers supporting Mr. Obama for president. Then he decided to lay off those workers.

The e-mail finishes with: "These folks wanted change; I gave it to them." [...]

Roof of Temple Dome Contains Iridium (India)

http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/Cities/Thirupuram/Temple_in_limelight_for_reactive_power_of_dome/articleshow/3737498.cms

Times of India
20 November 2008

Temple in limelight for 'reactive' power of dome

PTI

THIRUVANANTHAPURAM: A little known temple in the sleepy hamlet of Muthavazhy in Aalapuzha district of Kerala has shot into limelight following speculation that its dome may contain iridium, a metal costlier than gold.

The 'power' of the dome became an object of curiosity and discussion as people found that the cells of their torchlights 'burnt out' and batteries of mobile phones 'damaged' when kept close to it. [...]

http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/India/Rumours_of_iridium_in_temple_dome_has_Kerala_village_in_a_flutter/articleshow/3742188.cms

Times of India
22 November 2008

Rumours of iridium in temple dome has Kerala village in a flutter

G Ananthakrishnan, TNN

THIRUVANANTHAPURAM: A little-known temple in Kerala's Alappuzha district has suddenly more visitors than ever before. And not all of them are interested in offering prayers to the deity of Karthikeya: some are even offering crores of rupees to buy its dome.

The new-found interest is because of rumours about the presence of radioactive iridium on the dome of the Karthikeya temple in Pandanad village. [...]

http://www.hindu.com/2008/11/16/stories/2008111661310900.htm

The Hindu [India]
16 November 2008

Archaeology team inspects temple

Dennis Marcus Mathew

ALAPPUZHA: A team of the State Archaeology Department conducted inspections at the Pandanadu Muthavazhi Subrahmanya Swami temple near Chengannur here on Saturday, following claims and reports that the dome of the temple contained iridium, a precious metal several times costlier than gold. [...]

Tomato Sauce Infected with HIV+ Blood (S. Africa)

http://www.saps.gov.za/_dynamicModules/internetSite/newsBuild.asp?myURL=879

South African Police Service
21 November 2008

Another hoax e-mail
Tomato sauce infected with HIV+ blood

Pretoria

An e-mail is being widely circulated in which it is claimed that a well-known food chain sent letters out to schools warning about tomato sauce which could have been deliberately contaminated with the blood of an HIV+ person.

This e-mail has been brought to the attention of the South African Police Service and a thorough enquiry has revealed it to be a hoax which, unfortunately, is becoming an urban legend. Similar hoaxes have been discovered on web sites in other countries. [...]

http://www.capetimes.co.za/index.php?fArticleId=4727336

The Cape Times [South Africa]
24 November 2008

Wimpy says contaminated sauce claims are a 'hoax'

Natasha Joseph

FAST-FOOD restaurant chain Wimpy says its food and condiments are entirely safe and has labelled an e-mail which suggests a man was caught putting blood into a tomato-sauce dispenser "a hoax". [...]

Hitler's Ball

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article1945960.ece

The Sun [UK]
19 November 2008

Hitler HAD only got one ball

By ALEX PEAKE

AN extraordinary account from a German army medic has finally confirmed what the world long suspected: Hitler only had one ball.

War veteran Johan Jambor made the revelation to a priest in the 1960s, who wrote it down. [...]

The Scorpion in the Boot

Francis Buckland, Curiosities of Natural History, First Series, 4th ed. (London: Richard Bentley And Son, 1883), p. 188.

In India, scorpions are naturally fond of secreting themselves in holes, and have a nasty habit of getting into Wellington boots. One day an officer was putting on his boot. He felt something in it, and thinking it was a scorpion, he pulled it on instantly and stamped violently on the floor, thus killing the scorpion. He narrated this at mess. A few days afterwards another officer was pulling on his boot, when he, too, felt something in the boot. Recollecting the scorpion story, he thought he could not do better than stamp his foot down also in the boot. He did so, but the experiment did not succeed, as there was no scorpion this time, but a regimental spur with the rowel upwards.

Bosom Serpent (Late 19th Century)

Francis Buckland, Curiosities of Natural History, First Series, 4th ed. (London: Richard Bentley And Son, 1883), p. 35.

I was lately told a wonderful story by a raw Lancashire man. It appears that once upon a time there lived a man whose appetite was enormous: he was always eating and yet could never get fat, he was the thinnest and most miserable of creatures to look at. He always declared that he had something alive in his stomach; and a kind friend learned in doctoring confirmed his opinion, and prescribed a most ingenious plan to dislodge the enemy, a big Triton, who had taken up his quarters in the man's stomach. He was ordered to eat nothing but salt food and to drink no water; and when he had continued this treatment as long as he could bear it, he was to go and lie down near a weir of the river, where the water was running over, "with his mouth open." The man did as he was told, and open-mouthed and expectant placed himself by the side of the weir. The lizard inside, tormented by the salt food, and parched for want of water, heard the sound of the running stream, and came scampering up the man's throat, and jumping out of his mouth ran down to the water to drink. The sudden appearance of the brute so terrified the weakened patient that he fainted away, still with his mouth open. In the meantime the lizard had drunk his full and was coming back to return down the man's throat into his stomach: he had nearly succeeded in so doing when the patient awoke, and seizing his enemy by the tail killed him on the spot. I consider this story to be one of the finest strings of impossibilities ever recorded.

Pigs Fed on Dead Soldiers

Francis Buckland, Curiosities of Natural History, Third Series (London: Richard Bentley And Son, 1882), pp. 166-8.

It was now time to be off as we heard the wheels of the dog-cart rattle over the old bridge, on the railings of which were cut marks showing the length of a huge trout that had once been caught underneath it, and we soon arrived at Fordingbridge, where the landlady had a capital dinner for us all ready.

Among the dishes was some ham and eggs. I rang the bell. "Where did that ham come from, Mrs. Bill ?" said I.

"From Fordingbridge, sir," said the landlady.

"Are you quite sure? Have you had any Irishmen in the village lately?"

"No, sir."

"Then it's all right, thank you," said I.

"What's the matter with the ham ?" said Pennell.

"Oh, nothing," said I; "only I heard a story just before I left London, which makes me rather shy of bacon just now."

"What's the joke?— let's hear the story."

"Well, then, a lady told me that four or five Irishmen came a week or two since to Knaresborough in Yorkshire, where she lived, and set up stalls opposite the butchers' shops. These men brought bacon, which they sold in large quantities at 2 1/2d. a pound. The butchers were furious, and at last they said, 'We must hit upon some plan to get rid of these fellows; they are ruining our trade, for the people will not buy our meat at 7d. a pound when they can get bacon for 2 1/2d.' As the butchers were talking this matter over in front of their stalls in the market, an old woman came toddling up to know what the beef was a pound. 'Sevenpence, mum; we can't sell our beef at the same price as these Irishmen sell the bacon, because — don't you know all about it missus? Why all bacon is made from pigs as comes from 'Meriker; and don't you know, missus, what they feeds them on in 'Meriker ?' 'No,' said the old woman, 'how should I know ?' 'Why they feeds them on dead soldiers, as has been killed in the war; they picks up the bodies after the battles, and throws 'em into the pig-sties for the pigs — and that's what makes 'em so fat and so cheap.' 'Lord! good gracious, butcher! you don't say so? How shocking! those 'orrid Irishmen!' So off goes the old lady, with her bit of beef on a skewer, all round the market, telling everybody she met, young and old, that the Irishmen's bacon was 'fed on dead 'Merican soldiers.' The news spread like wildfire; a thrifty housekeeper was seen to throw a ham she had just bought for 5s. into the road, and nobody would pick it up; even a beggar passed it with contempt, and the inhabitants cleared their cupboards and larders of every morsel of the newly-purchased bacon. The next Saturday, the bacon men came as usual to the market, and there was not a man, woman, or child near their stalls: they brought the bacon down to three-halfpence a pound — but still no customers; and not even genuine, home-fed bacon could be sold by the regular shops. The Irishmen were furious at the butchers, and the butchers laughed at the Irishmen; anyhow, the bacon merchants immediately shut up shop, sheered off, and have never been heard of since in Knaresborough. I thought that possibly these same Irishmen might have come on to Fordingbridge, and therefore was anxious to know whether Mrs. Bill's bacon was fattened with English barleymeal or dead 'Merican soldiers."

Lady Hornby's Dog

Francis Buckland, Curiosities of Natural History, Third Series (London: Richard Bentley And Son, 1882), pp. 283-4.

Ladies have, I believe, as a rule, a better chance than gentlemen of taming wild animals, as the following will prove. My excellent and kind-hearted friend, the late lamented Lady Hornby, told me that she once expressed a wish, when residing at Constantinople, to try if she could tame a wild Turkish street dog, and asked some gentlemen to catch her one. They accordingly went out in pursuit, and in due course of time brought home their capture alive, half dead with fear, and as savage as possible.

The poor hunted thing immediately ran for protection to Lady Hornby, and would not quit her side. She tied it up in the stable, and by taking to it and feeding it herself, managed to make it quite tame. One day she was showing her pet to a gentleman who knows a good deal about animals.

When he saw it he said, "Why, Lady Hornby, what have you got here?"

"Oh, it's my tame street dog," was the answer.

"It's no street dog at all," said —; "it's a common brute of a wild jackal."

"Anyhow," said the lady, "dog or jackal, I have tamed him now, and don't mean to part with him," — a plain proof to all that female influence can tame the most ferocious of animals.

Sarah Palin's Ignorance of Africa

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/11/13/arts/television/13hoax.html?_r=1&hp&oref=slogin

The New York Times

13 November 2008

A Senior Fellow at the Institute of Nonexistence

By RICHARD PIREZ-PEQA

It was among the juicier post-election recriminations: Fox News Channel quoted an unnamed McCain campaign figure as saying that Sarah Palin did not know that Africa was a continent. [...]

[A "pair of obscure filmmakers," Eitan Gorlin and Dan Mirvish, take credit for starting the rumor.]

Earplugs Swallowed

Reader's Digest (Canadian edition), November, 2008, p. 118.

Offbase

My army-rescue unit was preparing to go to the range for our annual weapons qualification trial. I was the range safety officer.

After I finished the safety briefing, one young officer raised his hand. "What do I do so the noise won't hurt my ears?" he asked.

I held up a package of earplugs. "Take two of these," I said.

Before I could react, the officer opened the package and swallowed two earplugs. -- Brian Arnold

ASU Students Collect Plastic Bottle Caps for Chemotherapy

http://theapp.appstate.edu/content/view/4339/40/

The Appalachian [Appalachian State University, Boone, NC]
11 November 2008

Students collect caps despite possible hoax

by NIKKI ROBERTI
Lifestyles Reporter

When Beth M. Coggins told her Christian group about an elementary school student with cancer, they did not hesitate to help in Coggin's fundraising efforts.

Coggins began collecting bottle caps for an initiative where one bag of bottle caps equals one free treatment of chemotherapy. [...]

C (Train) = Si (Yes)

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/11/10/nyregion/10diary.html

New York Times
10 November 2008

Metropolitan Diary

Dear Diary:

A few years ago my husband was waiting at the West Fourth Street station for a Queens-bound E train. The E and C trains both stop on the same track.

The C train pulled in and, at the last minute, a man ran up to my husband and asked if this was the E train. My husband quickly replied, "C."

The man then said, "Gracias!" and ran onto the train. The doors closed and the train left the station. -- Dorothy M. Grusky

Dan Quayle's Bodyguards

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/top-stories/2008/11/09/barack-obama-what-life-will-be-like-for-new-us-president-115875-20881650/

The Sunday Mirror [UK]
9 November 2008

Barack Obama: What life will be like for new US President

By William Lowther in Washington and Kate Mansey

[...] At one time, the President and Vice-President were given three-inch-high models of the Washington Monument to put beside their beds. They had simply to knock them over to summon the guards.

But the models were abandoned after Vice-President Dan Quayle - noted for being clumsy - knocked his over late one night while making love to his wife.

In seconds, the door burst open, the lights went on and Mrs Quayle was thrown out of bed to the floor as bodyguards flocked around her husband to ensure his safety. [...]

Fatally Bitten Woman Kills Snake, Saves Baby

http://www.andalusiastarnews.com/news/2008/nov/08/storys-too-good-be-true/

Andalusia Star-News [AL]
8 November 2008

This story's too good to be true

Guest Columnist - Ed Williams

We called it the "snake in the dewberry patch" story. I was working at a weekly newspaper, The Brewton Standard, in the summer of 1981. [...]

Man drives by car in wooded area and sees children therein. Much later he returns and notes children still in car. Asks if they are alone and they tell him Mama's gone dewberry picking. He calls out for her and hearing no response, begins to investigate. Off by some dewberry vines, in a ditch, he finds the woman dead, the victim of a venomous bite. Woman has death grip on rattlesnake, which she has also killed.

End of story.

As we investigated the horrible tale, which everyone told us really happened, we found many variations with locales and persons changing. [...]

Obama Babies

http://www.chicagotribune.com/features/chi-talk-election-sex-07-nov07,0,2907959.story

Chicago Tribune

7 November 2008

Did you 'do it' on Election Night?
After Barack's romp, some say they had one too

By James Janega Tribune reporter

The term "Obama Baby" has joined the English language amid speculation that Tuesday's crowds of emotionally charged voters probably went home and just cold got it on. [...]

http://www.newsweek.com/id/169073

Newsweek
Published Nov 14, 2008 From the magazine issue dated Nov 24, 2008

Change You Can Conceive In
Could euphoric Obama fans be sparking a baby boom?

By Jessica Bennett

The theory is almost too perfect to be true. Barack Obama, the son of politically progressive parents, was born Aug. 4, 1961—almost nine months to the day after John F. Kennedy was elected to the White House. Is it possible Obama was conceived on that historic night?

And if so, could history repeat itself? In the hours and days since Obama's victory, many of his exhilarated supporters have been, shall we say, in the mood for love. [...]

Beware of Moving Black Bags

http://richmondhill.mype.co.za/

Richmond Hill Community Blog [Port Elizabeth, South Africa]

Keep an eye open for these!

We received this alert from the Mount Croix SCF, thanks guys!

Just a small warning of the latest way criminals operate –very inventive!!

The criminals dress in black & cover themselves in black bags & then get into your property (or wait on the pavement).

When SAPS or the neighbourhood watch drive pass they crouch down on the ground to make it look like a full black rubbish bag.

SAPS etc ignore the “black bags” & drive pass. The criminals then either wait for the home owner to come home — to hijack them or proceed to break into the house.

Please be aware & beware of “moving” black bags!!! –particularly on rubbish removal days.

PS: The neighbourhood watch member who noticed this wouldn’t have known any different if one of the bags hadn’t moved & if he wasn’t vigilant .

Posted under Neighbourhood Watch, SAFETY ADVICE, suspects to look out for

This post was written by Sue on October 24, 2008

http://thoselegends.blogspot.com/
Legends from a small country [South Africa]
30 October 2008
Burglars are a load of rubbish
Arthur Goldstuck

http://www.news24.com/Beeld/Suid-Afrika/0,,3-975_2410489,00.html
Beeld [South Africa]
15 October 2008
E-pos oor boewe in swartsakke 'gemors'
Francois Oosthuizen

Update: Worms in Vaginas

My page on African reports of the diaper-clad "Worms man" has been updated.

http://legendsrumors.blogspot.com/2008/09/worms-in-vaginas-africa.html

Tampered Treats (Halloween, 2008)

http://wnyt.com/article/stories/S643704.shtml?cat=300

WNYT-TV [Albany, NY]
2 November 2008

By: WNYT Staff

Parents find trick in child's treat

HALFMOON -- If you haven't checked your child's Halloween candy yet, police are asking you to do that now.

A straight pin was found in a piece of chocolate that a local child received while trick or treating.

Police say the parents found the pin while they were inspecting the candy. The child was in the Pine Ridge Developments off Sitterly Road in the Town of Halfmoon Friday night. [...]

http://news10now.com/content/top_stories/127241/pin-found-in-halloween-candy-in-clifton-park/Default.aspx

News 10 Now [Syracuse, NY]
3 November 2008

Pin found in Halloween candy in Clifton Park

By: Dave Detling

CLIFTON PARK, N.Y. -- "The only reason I saw it was because my light was shining on it," said the 13-year-old Clifton Park girl.

"She had opened the 3 Musketeers and thought that it was a piece of the foil that was still on the back of the 3 Musketeers," said the girl's mother.

But it was no wrapper. The 13-year-old said it was a pin inside her candy bar. [...]

http://www.rgj.com/article/20081106/NEWS/811060320/1321/NEWS

Reno Gazette-Journal [NV]
6 November 2008

Police look into suspicious candy

Reno police are investigating how push pins got into candy bars collected by a 10-year-old trick-or-treater on Halloween.

The girl and her parents reported the suspicious candy to Reno police just before 10 p.m. Friday.

Police said they believe someone intentionally put the push pins in multiple pieces of 3 Musketeers candy bars the girl collected. The exact neighborhood where she got the candy was unknown. [...]

http://www.canada.com/topics/news/national/story.html?id=6d2c8e8d-5938-4f57-9382-c14e851e9632

Canada.com
8 November 2008

Drugs found in Ont. Halloween candy

Canwest News Service

TORONTO - Police in southern Ontario are warning parents to check their kids' Halloween candy after cold medication was discovered in sealed boxes of Halloween candy.

On Wednesday, a Grade 5 student in Pickering, Ont., opened a box of Smarties collected while trick-or-treating Oct. 31 and found a DayQuil cold medication tablet among the candy, Durham Regional police said.

Since then four more cases have been confirmed, all involving the cold and flu medication in boxes of Smarties. [...]

http://www.canada.com/topics/news/national/story.html?id=835427f7-c140-4aea-85a6-da775488a1e8

Canada.com
13 November 2008

More cold tablets found in Ont. Halloween treats

Canwest News Service

PICKERING, Ont. - Another two cold medication tablets were found in sealed Smarties boxes given out during Halloween in Pickering, Ont., bringing the total of tampered treats to seven. [...]

http://www.medfordcentralrecord.com/WebApp/appmanager/JRC/Weekly?_nfpb=true&_pageLabel=pg_wk_article&r21.pgpath=%2FMED%2FNews&r21.content=%2FMED%2FNews%2FTopStoryList_Story_2579874

http://tinyurl.com/6rn3m2

Medford Central Record [NJ]
12 November 2008

Police warn of possible Halloween candy tampering

By Elaine J. Barton

MEDFORD-Township police yesterday issued a warning to Medford parents to closely inspect all candy collected by their children on Halloween.

On Wednesday, Police Chief Anthony J. Canale issued a press release saying his department has received two complaints from residents who found candy in their children's trick or treat baskets that had evidence of tampering.

He said the suspicious candy were snack packs of Peanut M & M's, where the back had been cut open, candy removed and replaced with pellets of what looked like animal food. The packages were then taped closed. [...]

http://www.thespec.com/News/BreakingNews/article/466561

Hamilton Spectator [ON]
14 November 2008

Burlington mom finds cold pill in Smarties

John Burman

Halton police are warning parents to re-check any Halloween candy their kids might have around the house after a Burlington mother discovered a cold tablet in her daughter's stash Wednesday.

Police said the woman opened a small, sealed box of Smarties intending to have a treat and found a single, Tylenol "DM" cold tablet inside the box. [...]

http://www.alamogordonews.com/news/ci_10920950

Alamogordo Daily News [NM]
7 November 2008

Razor blade found in candy

By Duane Barbati, Staff Writer

The Alamogordo Department of Public Safety is warning parents about Halloween candy after a mother found a single edged razor blade in her 10-year-old's candy bar Wednesday, a spokesman said.

Detective Sgt. Israel Trujillo said he received the 3 Musketeers fun size candy bar from a mother around 2 p.m. [...]

http://www.680news.com/news/headlines/more.jsp?content=20081117_190224_19888

680 News [Toronto]
17 November 2008

More tainted Halloween candy found, this time in Toronto

Shauna Hunt

Toronto - More cases of tainted Smarties in small Halloween size packages have been discovered.

This time it was found in the city. [...]

http://www.torontosun.com/news/torontoandgta/2008/11/18/7446506-sun.html

Toronto Sun
18 November 2008

Nestle: Smarties tampering not here

By DON PEAT, SUN MEDIA

Nestle Canada says tampering that's left cold medication in Smarties packages isn't happening at its factory. [...]

Mormon Rumors DVD

http://www.standard.net/live/features/147378/

Standard-Examiner [Ogden, UT]
2 November 2008

Mormon Myth-ellaneous

By Becky Wright
Standard-Examiner staff

[...] The new DVD "Mormon Myth-ellaneous: Amazing True Mormon Stories -- And Some That Should Be" (Covenant Communications, Inc., $16.95) examines urban legends with a Mormon twist, including the ideas that "Star Wars" character Yoda was based on an LDS prophet, and that Elvis read the Book of Mormon. [...]

A Stolen Frozen Turkey

George Hamilton & William Stadiem, Don't Mind If I Do (NY: Touchstone, 2008 ), p. 121.

There was one kind hostess at a place called the Knife and Fork, to whom I turned for aid and comfort when we were starving on Thanksgiving. "There's a turkey in the freezer," she said sweetly. "It's yours."

I went back into the freezer and picked up a huge thirty-five pound bird and hid it under my raincoat. But on my way out, who should come in but the owner, stationing himself between me and the door and chatting with the cashier. I didn't dare walk past him. I looked like a pregnant man with this bulge under my raincoat. Hollywood was full of weirdos, but I was pushing it here. So I ordered a cup of coffee at the counter and bided my time. And bided and bided... The owner didn't move, and the turkey began defrosting. Soon a puddle was forming at my feet. This pregnant man looked like he was either peeing or breaking water. Then, even worse, the long turkey neck defrosted and fell off into my lap, between my legs. When the owner finally walked away, I hightailed it out the door, leaving a huge flood at the counter behind me. Talk about giving thanks. We cooked that bird and lived on it for weeks.