Saturday, September 29, 2012

Roadkill Found in Chinese Restaurant's Kitchen

WKYT-TV [Lexington, KY]
28 September 2012

WILLIAMSBURG, Ky. (WKYT) - A Chinese restaurant [was] forced to shut its doors after getting caught with a dead deer in the kitchen.

It happened Thursday afternoon at the Red Flower Chinese Restaurant in Williamsburg. [...]

The restaurant owner tells the health department that he wasn't going to serve the road kill to customers, but instead to his family. [...]

Some customers like Katie Hopkins say, even if they reopen, they won't be going back, "I don't think I'll ever eat Chinese food ever again."

Alice Cooper Kills Chickens

Rolling Stone, 24 June 1982, p. 54

The Rolling Stone Interview
Pete Townshend: The Guitarist Faces Up to Alcoholism and the Final Days of the Who

By Kurt Loder

Pete Townshend: [Rock music is] a very, very powerful and potent force, and it can be used for fairly distasteful purposes. I remember being horrified seeing Alice Cooper beheading live chickens on stage. And it didn't really redeem him that I had smashed guitars, you know? Somewhere, there was a line. I don't know whether it was just because it was live, or because it was real blood. But the fact that he later went on to make some great records didn't redeem him, either. He's sick, tragic, pathetic -- and will always be that way. I'll say hello to him in the street, but I'll never tip my hat to him.

[Is Townshend claiming he either attended or saw footage of a performance in which Alice Cooper killed a chicken, something Cooper denies he ever did? The big break for Alice was the 1969 Toronto Rock & Roll Revival concert, where he and the band entertained the crowd with their usual antics like eviscerating defenseless pillows and tossing around the feathers. But then a live chicken appeared and broke the routine. This anecdote has been told countless times by Alice, who usually claims the chicken was tossed onstage by someone in the audience. Alice threw the chicken into the crowd, and it was apparently torn to shreds. In Supermensch: The Legend of Shep Gordon, the 2014 documentary directed by Mike Myers, both he and his manager (Gordon) now claim the hapless bird was thrown out by Gordon.]

Alice Cooper: Sixty thousand people. We go on, and it’s great. We’re tearing the place up, and the feathers are going, and I look down and there’s a chicken on stage. The only person that could’ve brought the chicken was Shep. Because nobody in the audience would bring a chicken to that concert. Nobody would say, “OK, I’ve got my keys, I got my tickets, I got my chicken….”

Shep Gordon: I thought, let’s have a live chicken! It would be fantastic. I threw it out at them.

AC: I took the chicken and tossed it, thinking, it had feathers, it should fly. Well, it didn’t fly as much as it plummeted.

SG: Everybody went wild.

AC: The audience tore it to pieces.

SG: They threw it back at him. They threw back wings and legs and heads [sic] came flying back up on the stage. And then I saw blood, so I turned my head, ‘cause I faint when I see blood.

AC: The next day in the paper: “ALICE COOPER RIPS HEAD OFF CHICKEN AND DRINKS THE BLOOD.” What should have been incredibly horrible press for anybody became the thing that put us on the map.

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Robbers Offering to Change Light Bulbs for Free

Gulf News [UAE]
25 September 2012

Spam message warns of robbers posing as Dewa/Sewa personnel

By Mariam M. al Serkal, Staff Reporter

Dubai: Police are warning residents not to believe spam messages that have been posted over social networking sites claiming that employees from the electricity and water authority are robbing people’s homes at gunpoint.

The spam message, which was circulated heavily over Blackberry messenger last week, claims that: “Three or four [men] may visit your home claiming they are from DEWA/SEWA, to install shower caps, to save water! They may claim they are from Eskom to change light bulbs for free! They have been spotted in several areas. Please do not let them into your homes. They are robbers robbing people at gunpoint. Please broadcast to all your contacts, you may save a life.” [...]

Jews Are Poisoning Dogs with Mushroom Spores

The Village Voice [NY]
25 September 2012

By James King

[...] But we assure you that Brooklyn Jews are not using mushroom spores to poison gentile dogs. However, this is an actual rumor that currently is circulating in my neighborhood -- as confirmed by two of my neighbor's friends (one of whom is convinced her dog's urinary tract infection was brought on by the poisonous mushrooms) and multiple Orthodox Jews in the neighborhood. [...]

Saturday, September 22, 2012

"You piss on my date and you say you're sorry?"

[A story Jacobson obviously loves to tell evolves into a memorate. -- bc]

Rolling Stone, 6 August 1981, p. 18

Times Square
A Report from the Sleaziest Block in America

By Mark Jacobson

[In a conversation with the head of New York City's Office of Midtown Enforcement, the writer admits to being an aficionado of the local grind theaters.] "Great places if you stay out of the balcony. Angel Dust City. Very important to the development of my sensibility, very important to the formation of my personal vision of Times Square. Everyone knocks them, but they're great. Haven't you heard the great Forty-second Street movie line, the one everyone claims to have been there when it was said? A voice comes out of the balcony saying, 'Sorry? You piss on my date and you say you're sorry?'" [...]

New York Magazine, 3 January 2000

Happy Ending
Even in the new Times Square, signs of the possibly imminent apocalypse are everywhere. But thanks to Rudy and Hollywood, we may not recognize it when it comes.

By Mark Jacobson

[...] Down 42nd street, the new Arnold movie, the cannily timed and titled End of Days, is at the brand-new Loews thirteen-screen "E Walk" theater. Once upon a not too distant past, this street, and the movie theaters formerly situated here, sticky-floored, semen-smeared dumps like the Harris, Selwyn, and Liberty, invoked their own kind of post-apocalyptic landscape. One could watch Bruce Lee coil his coil of doom and hear a scream from the balcony: "You're sorry? You piss on my date and you say you're sorry?!" [...]

New York Magazine, 7 April 2003

Times Up
Times Square’s sin and vice and squalor helped define the New York experience. They still do. In our minds.

By Mark Jacobson

[...] Not every package-deal tourist sees the charm in having his feet stick to the floor at the old Selwyn (or Harris, or Lyric) during the eye-gouge scene from The Good, the Bad and the Ugly as some balcony denizen shouts, “You’re sorry? You piss on my date and you say you’re sorry?” [...]

New York Magazine, 15 February 2009

No Kiss Kiss, All Bang Bang
Spielberg-loving, Spike Lee-attacking critic Armond White is the film world’s brother from another planet.

By Mark Jacobson

[...] [N]ot so very long time ago, the film freak could put his feet on a sticky floor at the old Brandt Times Square theater and see a triple bill of Sergio Leone’s immortal trilogy, Fistful of Dollars, For a Few Dollars More, and The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly for $1.50. The in-theater entertainment was also memorable, such as on the immortal evening when, right in the middle of Enter the Dragon, yours truly heard some skell in the balcony scream, “You’re sorry? You piss on my date and you say you’re sorry?” [...]

[Here are a few other occurrences of this anecdote I've found. The first is from a novel. -- bc]

Geoffrey Wolf, The Final Club (Knopf, 1990), p. 91.

[...] And another, unlucky in drink at the Columbia game, roused from blackout at Palmer Stadium by a Cap and Gown senior screaming: "You're sorry? Sorry! You piss on my date's raccoon coat and silk hose and advise me you're sorry? Oh, you'll know sorry, sir. We'll show you sorry. You'll eat the next two years out of tin cans. Remember me." [...]

Ariel Leve as featured in The Sunday Times magazine

[Leve's interview of actor Dustin Hoffman originally appeared in the 3 December 2006 issue of London's Sunday Times Magazine under the title "Confessions of a Driven Man." -- bc]

Dustin Hoffman

[...] He recalls: "To this day, Bob Duvall says it was one of the best times of when we were all living together. Because I'd come home and they'd say, 'What did so-and-so do today?' " Hoffman would act out the characters he'd met there. He tells me how Hackman would see six films a day on his day off. "He'd spend his entire day in the cinema. It was a place where the homeless went, because for 35 cents they could sleep there all day. He was in there at 10am and he heard one homeless guy in the balcony saying, 'You're sorry? You're sorry? What do you mean, you're sorry? You piss all over my date and you say you're sorry?' [...]"

Language Log

"Sorry" Spectacles

Posted by Geoff Nunberg at April 16, 2007 06:35 PM

Listening to the latest in high-profile public apologies -- from Alberto Gonzales, Paul Wolfowitz, and Don Imus -- took me back to an incident that happened in my undergraduate days at Columbia about a million years ago. A bunch of my friends and I used to spend long afternoons and evenings at the movie theaters along West 42d Street, where for less than a buck you could see a double or triple feature of gangster movies, war movies or westerns. That was well before the area was sanitized and Disneyfied, and the theaters were -- well, "seedy" hardly begins to say it. The seats and carpeting were shabby and permanently saturated with a mixture of fluids, processed and unprocessed. The balconies were sharply raked, the rows so close together as to make even the economy section of a United Airlines flight seem positively spacious. And the clientele was a mix of movie buffs, lonely guys, and down-and-outers who considered 99 cents a stone bargain for a warm place to sleep off a bender. So it was that a friend and I found ourselves in the balcony of a largely empty theater one rainy weekday evening watching an Anthony Mann western when we heard a middle-class male voice behind us saying in a loud, indignant tone: "Sorry? You piss on my date and you're SORRY?"

I didn't actually see the malefactor, and it occurs to me only now (a little sadly) that the remark might have been simply a prank. [...]

Monday, September 17, 2012

Fraudulent Voters Bused in

New York Times
17 September 2012

Conservative Groups Focus on Registration in Swing States


It might as well be Harry Potter's invisible Knight Bus, because no one can prove it exists.

The bus has been repeatedly cited by True the Vote, a national group focused on voter fraud. Catherine Engelbrecht, the group's leader, told a gathering in July about buses carrying dozens of voters showing up at polling places during the recent Wisconsin recall election.

"Magically, all of them needed to register and vote at the same time," Ms. Engelbrecht said. "Do you think maybe they registered falsely under false pretenses? Probably so."

Weeks later, another True the Vote representative told a meeting of conservative women about a bus seen at a San Diego polling place in 2010 offloading people "who did not appear to be from this country."

Officials in both San Diego and Wisconsin said they had no evidence that the buses were real. "It's so stealthy that no one is ever able to get a picture and no one is able to get a license plate," said Reid Magney, a spokesman for the Wisconsin agency that oversees elections. In some versions the bus is from an Indian reservation; in others it is full of voters from Chicago or Detroit. "Pick your minority group," he said.

The buses are part of the election fraud gospel according to True the Vote, which is mobilizing a small army of volunteers to combat what it sees as a force out to subvert elections. [...]

In Racine, conservative poll watchers also alleged fraud, including a claim that a busload of union members from Michigan had come to Wisconsin to vote illegally. The Racine County Sheriff's Department determined that the accusation had been based on an anonymous call to a radio station.

"There is no evidence this bus convoy existed or ever arrived in Racine County," the Sheriff's Office said.

As for the buses her organization saw in Wisconsin, Ms. Engelbrecht could not provide details. "It was reported to us that this had occurred," she said. "I know these sightings were also being reported on the radio." [...]

Saturday, September 8, 2012

Drones Photograph Wives

The Economist [UK]
1 September 2012

Yemen and the United States
It is uncertain whether America's drones have their intended effect

SANA'A -- [...] If these tribesmen are anything to go by, the Americans' increasingly active deployment of drones is far from winning Yemeni hearts and minds in the battle against jihadism.

"Our people ask how these foreign planes have a right to come here and kill them, even if some of the people they kill are al-Qaeda," says a friend of the sheikh, a smuggler. "The other thing is that they think the drones are taking photos of them and spying on them. Because of this, our people have finished with America. They see America as this," he adds, making the letter X with his fingers. All the men on the cushions are convinced that drones photograph their wives, a vile insult in conservative Yemen. [...]

Saturday, September 1, 2012

Sect Kills by Phone Calls (Nigeria)

The Nation [Nigeria]
31 August 2012

By Adekunle Jimoh

The Kwara State Police Command has dispelled rumours of the alleged killing of people by the Boko Haram sect through phone calls.

The police denounced the stories contained in text messages as untrue and advised people to ignore them.

The alleged killings through phone calls had created apprehension among people of the state recently.

The text message reads: "Do not pick any call from this number (08061197911) because Boko Haram sect has been killing people through the number.

"They have killed four people in Ilorin this month.  Two people have also been killed at Egbe, while Mr. Adediran at Omu-Aran died this morning, send it to your people." [...]

Saturday Tribune [Nigeria]
1 September 2012
Written by Biola Azeez, Ilorin